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Thanks for the Daily Stalking

ABOUT
Female. 18. Currently a college student. We will see how that goes.

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thebigblackwolfe:

frantzfandom:

girilla-warfare:

the-average-gatsby:

the-average-gatsby:

how do you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber

ask them to pronounce “unionized”

Holy fuck thats clever

It took me 5 minutes to get this

FUCK

Oh fuck you.

sparklesmccheesy:

ittygittydiddynator:

iheichouguys:

lifehackable:

This is potentially life saving information everyone should know.

No you guys this post helped me find my cat. He was missing for almost a month and I’ve had him for over 12 years. After seeing this I put his favorite blanket he always slept on outside hoping he would smell mine or his scent and he was back the next fucking day asleep on it.

When my cat got out, we called and called for him, and then, later that night, I remembered similar advice to this, and so put his little scratching pad, which he adores, on the front porch. Not even half an hour later, I heard a thump, opened the door, and there was his big butt, meowing at me.

Important and vital

sparklesmccheesy:

ittygittydiddynator:

iheichouguys:

lifehackable:

This is potentially life saving information everyone should know.

No you guys this post helped me find my cat. He was missing for almost a month and I’ve had him for over 12 years. After seeing this I put his favorite blanket he always slept on outside hoping he would smell mine or his scent and he was back the next fucking day asleep on it.

When my cat got out, we called and called for him, and then, later that night, I remembered similar advice to this, and so put his little scratching pad, which he adores, on the front porch. Not even half an hour later, I heard a thump, opened the door, and there was his big butt, meowing at me.

Important and vital

petpup:

today a teenage white boy looked me straight in the face, pointed at himself, winked at me, and said “so how about helping papa bear with his math homework?” and i think i was speechless for a total of 10 seconds before telling him i dont associate with people who call themselves papa bear

educationalpancakes:

ayumichan46:

YES IT CAME BACK

THIS IS THE ONLY ONE OF THESE THAT IS EVEN REMOTELY ACCEPTABLE THANK YOU

(Source: sunnyotakuu)

breakfastburritoe:

in first grade we had to write down our favorite ice cream flavor and the whole class put cookie dough so i put cookie dough bc peer pressure and then we were asked to color in an ice cream scoop with our favorite flavor and i had no clue what cookie dough was so i colored it blue and the class made fun of me and then some kid ate a napkin

*Man walks into a store and finds employee*
Man: Alright, I've had enough. Why haven't you guys hired me?!
Employee: Uh...well sir, when did you put in your application?
Man: I never filled out an application.
Employee: Well sir, we can't consider you for employment if you've never filled out an application.
Man: No, that's bullshit, because I've been coming here for years now, and every single time I tell you all how much I love this store and how much I appreciate your customer service, unlike some of your other customers might I add!
Employee: Well, but that doesn't-
Man: AND I even told you that I didn't have a job!
Employee: But sir, that doesn't indicate to us that you would like a job at our store. And again, if you've never filled out an application, we can't consider you. Besides, we're not hiring.
Man: OH! Not hiring, HA! What a laugh. I see your store go through seasonal workers all the time. They come and go like nothing, but you won't consider me as a part-time employee even though I KNOW you've been looking for workers to fill positions? That's insane!
Employee: Sir, we've been looking to hire a few people for management positions. Do you have any management experience?
Man: Well no, but what does that matter?
Employee: ...Well sir, that's what we're looking for. You won't be suitable for the position without management experience.
Man: Oh that's such a load of crap. You know, you'll be waiting around a long time for a manager if you don't lower your standards a little. Who cares if someone knows how to manage a store? I LOVE this store and I'm willing to work here, that's all that should matter to you.
Employee: That...doesn't make any sense.
Man: NO! I'm done. This is over. From now on, no more Mr. Nice Guy.
Employee:
Man:
Employee:
Man: Fuck you, slut.

solitarycheese:

clambistro:

burgerrr:

circuit-city:

whenever i have those brutal searing being-dissolved-from-inside period cramps during school or work i pretend i am a viking warlord who has been stabbed in the abdomen but i killed the assailant so i’m the only one who knows im injured and i have to carry on normally til the end of the battle to keep up my mens morale

this is good

Gonna adopt this method of dealing

perfect

(Source: synapolitan)

naturepunk:

did-you-kno:

Zoo Jeans is a company that lets lions, tigers, and bears “design” jeans by tearing holes in the denim. The finished products are auctioned off to raise money for the Kamine Zoo in Hitachi, Japan. Source

OKAY NO, BUT FOLLOW THE LINK AND WATCH THE VIDEO. This is awesome. 

naturepunk:

did-you-kno:

Zoo Jeans is a company that lets lions, tigers, and bears “design” jeans by tearing holes in the denim. The finished products are auctioned off to raise money for the Kamine Zoo in Hitachi, Japan. Source

OKAY NO, BUT FOLLOW THE LINK AND WATCH THE VIDEO. This is awesome.